Do you really know the motivation for this augmentation?
Grace, you ask me this question about my breast lift and breast augmentation. Let me be completely honest with you. Since I gave birth and nursed my boys, I told myself I was going to give myself a new set of breasts when I turn forty. That was going to be my gift to myself. Then I saw a photograph of the woman that Adam had been flirting with. She was dressed in a glittery bra and her breasts were protruding—and they weren’t just sprouting, but in full bloom! I thought, “He told me he didn’t care about size.” She wasn’t pretty, but she had big boobs. Then, I thought, “That’s it. Why should I wait until I’m forty when I deserve them now.” And Adam can enjoy them too.
So, Grace, the motivation is twofold: to lift my body, literally, and to lift my hopes that Adam will enjoy them as much as he may have enjoyed hers. (I still don’t know exactly what has happened.)
So, Eve, what are your breasts trying to say?
With certainty, Grace, I can say my breasts are saying, “Help! We’ve fallen and we can’t get up!” I know, I know, trite, but true. And like any good person would do, you want to help the fallen. I feel like we’ve done the best with what we have. Well, like you said, I had an abundance of milk and God blessed me tremendously with the milk glands to produce mass quantities of breastmilk for my baby boys. I think it’s time I reward my breasts and myself and uplift their spirits as well as mine.
What type of connection do they have to your body, your mind and your spirit?
This is a good question. Breasts are extremely powerful for the state of body, mind and spirit for a woman. I might venture to say it’s similar to the state of body, mind and spirit a man might have about the size of his penis. Although I once heard, “It’s not the size of the wand, but what the wizard does with his wand,” I still believe men are preoccupied with the size of their penis regardless whether they are amazing lovers.
For me, my breasts, or lack thereof, have perhaps inhibited me in bed. I didn’t necessarily feel quite sexy, voluptuous, or feminine. I wore padded bras, never quite feeling comfortable with what was beneath. And although I can rationalize things in my mind—I am intelligent, confident in the workplace, secure in my previous relationships—I never became quite comfortable with having small breasts. I just prefer and admire larger ones. And so, I am at an age and period in my life where I can make an informed decision about why I want them—and boy, do I want them!
Honestly, Grace, don’t know if this is too much information, but I can’t wait to play with them and have fun. Talk about role playing and being creative in my adult playground. I’ll drink to that…Merlot, anyone?
Guiding Lesson: Hi, Eve. I can see that you have thought about what your breasts mean to you and the rationale for lifting them up. I laughed so hard when I heard you say that your breasts are crying out for help since they have fallen and can’t get up. I can actually picture them and I see the ever-courageous Eve running to their rescue before they finish the race to her knees. The imagery is priceless!
So do you believe that this procedure will win Adam back without addressing the indiscretions? I know breasts have been awfully powerful and men tend to become mesmerized no matter how many they have seen. The brightest, composed, classy, powerful men have been blinded at times and can’t think straight beyond the moment. However, I have not heard of any breast having the power to save a marriage. After the augmentation, they may be able to be used as floatation devices and hence safe a life; however, save a marriage, not sure about that.
I can understand your hope. I am rooting for you. I just don’t want you to place so much faith in silicone or saline. There is so much more that needs to happen. Sitting down with Adam and having an honest heart to heart conversation is what is needed. Eve, you can do whatever you want, but if you hope Adam sees you, it will require the art of sincere dialogue to help discover if there is any hope. We need to know what Adam is thinking. What are his concerns? What is he hoping for in this marriage? What was missing? Does he want to start the journey back to your heart – beyond your breasts?
Oh, Eve, I know this is painful. When you uplift your breast, do it for you. Regarding Adam, it’s time to get real and face the truth of where he stands in this marriage. Once you know where he stands, then as a couple you need to decide on what steps to take next. If you want to have hope, then believe in who you are and what you have to offer, regardless of the breast implants. Don’t minimize your self-worth to one part of your body. Let the procedure be icing on a cake, but not the entire cake. So now wave your magic wand of hope and see what you get. Let me know.