I took Bradley Method classes in preparation for my son’s birth. The instructor explained the importance of breathing naturally, working with your body to prepare for natural childbirth, reducing the stress of labor, and having a partner coach you through the several stages of labor. During the classes they suggested various ways to minimize the pain, relax and walk through the pain. Fortunately, Adam was a great birthing coach. His voice was calming, caring and was in tune to what I needed. I remember using a camelback to take sips of water in between contractions. I also remember eating several snacks to maintain my energy. During labor I decided to take a hot shower, letting the water hit my lower back, which really helped release some of the pain. And Adam, being a good partner, followed me right in with the camelback. Giving me small sips after each wave of pain. He was soaked, but he didn’t mind.
Afterwards, I had to go to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet for what seemed to be thirty minutes. Each time I tried to get up, I just couldn’t. I was in extreme pain and thought I’m going to have this baby in the toilet. Oh, no, that couldn’t happen! I had a horrible vision of accidentally flushing the toilet. Adam assured me that I would not give birth on the toilet. Somehow, with all my strength and help from Adam, I got up from the toilet and out of the bathroom just in time to lie on the bed. With a few pushes, my son arrived within fifteen minutes or so. A few stitches here and there (you know where) and I was good to go.
At that time, I didn’t realize what had happened. I had stayed on the toilet because I was at the end of the active stage called transition. As much pain as I was in during this stage, I was so happy to have gone through what I did just to have my baby boy in my arms. I was so blessed and would go through pain of natural childbirth any day.
Guiding Lesson: Eve, I have to give you credit for what women go through. Birthing new life, though you want it, it is not always filled with joy. Isn’t it amazing that before childbirth, you did more talking about it? Yet, when you entered into the experience there is no room for words. The only thing you can do is to surrender to the moment, let go of all control and allow new life to emerge. And when you think about it, it is not you doing it, it is being done in and through you. The best thing to do is get out of the way and participate fully in this miracle.
Oh Eve, did you ever realize the wonder of your body and what it did to give you that little boy? Did you notice how vital it was for you to become attentive and work with your body to bring about new life? This experience is something I will ask you to remember. Giving birth does not end after childbirth. As a mother, a wife and a career woman you will be called on many times to give birth. It will not always be easy, pleasant or without pain. Like childbirth, you need to remember the power of your breath to walk through the pain; the power of caring and staying in tune to your body that signals what you need to get through things; and the importance of finding people who can provide support and be that calm in the midst of the storm. Eve, you did it! Now enjoy the miracle in your arms.
As a parent of 4 grown up children, I can tell you that you will feel the pain of giving birth over and over and over again during the rearing of your children and even when they are adults. As with the contractions in the birthing process, you will feel contractions with every obstacle/challenge your child faces. You have such a connection with your child, a bond that is so deep. You revel in their accomplishments and feel their pain. And the most amazing thing, as it is after you give birth and they put that precious miracle in your arms and all the pain you felt is erased, this is the same as you go through each each hurdle with your child, the pain erases and you just feel love.