As a single mother, and stressed in every possible way, I’m learning to be patient with my boys. Seeing the way my parents interact as grandparents is teaching me to be more loving and caring in the way I speak to my boys when I discipline. There are moments when I take steps back, naturally. During stressful times, divorce can take a toll on my reactions, not just with Adam, but also with our children. I am being mindful of how I respond to them, trying to catch myself before I feel I’m redirecting my anger for Adam onto them.
There are moments when I’m proud of lowering my voice, breathing before I say anything, or simply choosing to ask a reflective question first. It’s after these moments when I recognize my small achievements. It’s during these times when I see how I’m learning to be patient.
Funny, Grace, how a small gesture of patience can change an entire afternoon’s direction, from frustrated to delightful in just letting things go. Knowing that we all make mistakes and understanding that children are entitled to make mistakes gives me a sense of relief. I have to remember that patience accompanies a great sense of human love—even if it is for Adam.
“Adapt the pace of nature; her secret is patience.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Eve, it’s amazing the benefits of practicing patience. Your moments transform and so do the people around you. Then why is it so hard to live in this state? You see how your children respond and you notice how you become a more loving person. What can you do to have more of this wonderful gift?
I have to say it baffles me how this word can drive you crazy or bring you peace. It all depends how quickly you want to achieve results, want to have things done your way or simply want a quick fix. And yet nature whispers through the changing seasons to “wait, slow down and be patient.” It takes time to pass from winter to spring, for seeds to sprout, for plants to bear fruit, and even for babies to be born. There are no shortcuts. If you try to hurry any of these things, it may result in complications or endings. Nature seems to understand the practice, the power and the purpose of patience. Read Pearls of Grace’s wisdom, “Nature Understands the 3 P’s of Patience.”
So Eve, patience can change your life, your children’s lives and the lives of all you meet. By understanding the practice, the power and purpose of patience, it will help you step out of the crazy, fast-paced world and enter into living your life. You will be able to “see” your children and “hear” their concerns and “hug” them more. Patience will be a path that will bring forth more joy and wholeness because you won’t miss the important moments in your life and your children’s lives as they grow. Don’t buy into that life goes by quickly. It only does when you let go of your practice, your power and your purpose to live patiently. I know it may sound unrealistic because of the demands you have. At least set time aside each week so your days don’t turn into weeks, or months, years or even decades. Do what you can and add a little patience. It is an important ingredient to living life as it is meant to be lived.