Spending Christmas with Adam and the boys makes me realize just how happy the boys are when we are together. They were ecstatic just ripping open their presents on Christmas Day. Adam and I seemed so happy just watching their reaction to every new gift that was presented to them. I thought it was a shame that we were ending our marriage for some really poor choices Adam made. He still hasn’t realized the gravity of the consequences.
I made our traditional Christmas Day breakfast while he played with the boys. Then we went to his family’s gathering. The boys continued to express their delight at every new gift they received and played the entire day with their new toys.
Overwhelmed by the joy of watching the boys unwrap gifts, smile, and play endlessly, I simply began to cry at the end of the day. Would there be another day like this when we would be a family again? Could my boys be loved just as much as Adam loves them by someone else? Will I experience love and happiness again?
I began to devour the leftover Santa cookies and poured a glass of Merlot.
Guiding Lesson: Well Eve, it sounds like you had a good Christmas day with the boys and Adam. Your sons were so busy opening up their gifts and looked so happy. There happiness was not just based on the gifts they receive,d but the gift that you and Adam gave by choosing to celebrate this special day together as a family. There is no gift that a child can enjoy thoroughly without the foundational gift of a family’s love. All gifts that come after this initial gift help give meaning and substance to children. Without this, all other gifts seem empty and keep children wanting more and never being fully satisfied.
Kudos to you and Adam for placing your children above your needs. This will have a positive impact in the years to come.
I can understand how this day can bring so much joy and also so much sadness as you feel it slipping away. The day’s end helps prepare you for rest but is also a reminder of letting go of what the day was and prepare you for a new one.
Why must something so wonderful end? Something that brought so much joy. What can’t you hold on to it? Tomorrow has no guarantees and is filled with uncertainty and questions as well as possibly redefining family.
Lean into it and reach for my hand as you begin to bid farewell to this moment and get ready to embrace another day. I can’t promise what tomorrow may bring. No one can. However, you and Adam have the power to choose to create moments that will bless your children as they feel the incredible love you both have for them. They will “thank you” for this when they are older.
Eve, I leave you with the Serenity Prayer:
God, give me the serenity to accept the things I can not change,
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.