Grace, I don’t know why I’m so surprised by what you say. You’re able to put things in a perspective that makes me really think about my life. You ask me “what do you feel now when you realize that Adam cannot compare to your dependable Merlot?  Your wine membership seems to be much more savory and fulfilling than your marriage membership.  How does this make you feel?  Are you at a point to place Merlot in the right place in your life so you can continue to explore your inner soul?”

You ask some really good questions for me and, at this very moment, I don’t know how to reply. I am hurt, disappointed and feel betrayed by what I have just discovered about Adam. Merlot doesn’t hurt me, make me disappointed or betray me. Yet, there are times when I take one too many sips of Merlot and he begins to play tricks on me. Then Merlot gets put on the shelf for awhile until I’m ready to makeup with him.

During this time, Adam looks really good. He’s supportive and understands why Merlot is on the shelf. He even takes care of me when I’m aching. Adam has an amazing tolerance, but I’m sure that’s because of his height and weight. He can handle Merlot in volumes.

Why is it that Adam knows what to do for me when I’m in pain? He lends a caring hand, he listens attentively, and he knows just what to say to put me at ease. I was so fortunate that Adam entertained the thought of going to see a marriage counselor. Oftentimes, when we’d have some challenges in our marriage, we went to counseling. Do you remember, Grace? And although counseling left a good taste in my mouth for what we had, I still think, paired with a Merlot, marriage was easier to swallow.

Guiding Lesson: Eve, I can understand that the questions can be daunting when you are hurting, in pain and have been betrayed by someone you love.  Matters of the heart can bring even brilliant people who are of sound judgment to lose their balance, focus and ability to think.  The heart is filled with raw emotions.  There is nothing that the head can say, no matter how knowledgeable, intelligent or factual the information is, that will bring healing to a shattered heart…not even Merlot can heal this.

Eve, here, take my hand.  Let’s go into your pain without Merlot.  Let’s do this together.  By going into it, we will get through it on the other side. Be not afraid, I will go before you and guide you.  I will shine the light. It is time to truly feel your feelings.  Feel them until there is nothing left of that feeling.  Empty yourself of all the hurt, pain and betrayal. Embrace them for they will teach you.  Befriend them and don’t allow them to stay your enemy because true friends won’t hurt you.  Listen to what they need to tell you.  They have a message and will alert you to the situation around you.  These feelings help you wake up to You, to Truth, to New Life.

Your feelings are an invitation and the blueprints.  They are the key to creating your future.  If you do this, I promise you that the feelings of hurt, pain and betrayal will be transformed to feelings of comfort,  joy and trust.  The new you will emerge stronger.  And guess what?  You will have done this without Adam or Merlot.  This journey is truly about you. Will you take it?

Posted by Marisol Barrios as MissGuided Mom's "Eve"

After 12 years of marriage, I found myself suddenly divorced with two sons to raise. Inspired by life's events, I decided to create "Eve" and tell her story, a story that will resonate with many women. "Eve" will take you through the good, the bad, and the ugly of marriage, motherhood, career and divorce. After numerous delicate situations, she decides to surrender her life to a higher being and welcomes her guardian angel who teaches her life lessons. Join "Eve," her guardian angel, and friends as she takes you through an unimaginable journey of self-discovery. (Pictured: Caterina Clarke as MissGuided Mom's Guardian Angel "Grace" and Marisol Barrios as MissGuided Mom's "Eve")

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